Moment by Moment: A Review AND Giveaway!

This giveaway is now closed.  Thanks for your entries!  I'll post a winner sometime tomorrow.  Don't forget to head on over to CarlaMacLachlan.com for an excerpt of the book AND to check out the awesome Buy1,Give1 special going on this week (with free shipping).

If you're anything like me, you have moments of sheer frustration, as your child (or niece/nephew, or student, or neighborhood kid)  asks "Why?" for the umpteenth time, ignores a direct instruction, or looks at you blankly as though the simplest request has been one request too many that day.

If you're like me, you find no comfort in hearing certain phrases come out of your mouth, whether in desperation, or for lack of anything better to say.  It might be "because I said so" or "because I'm the [mom] and you're the kid" or "no more questions, you're driving me crazy" or even "I'm so tired of you [committing this certain act of disobedience or annoyance]."

I earnestly desire to be a good mom, but I make mistakes, I get frustrated, and there are days I know that I'm leaning wholly on my own abilities (which are lacking). I do all this even though I know I should be leaning instead on the One who has given me this calling and the three (almost four) wonderful blessings who are in my care.

I don't want to compartmentalize my faith in its own pretty little church "box" and still flounder as a parent.  Instead of passing on our culture's pattern of making faith just another aspect of life, I want to raise children who value biblical truth above all else and can apply it to every aspect of life.

That's why I'm really excited about this new book, Parenting Moment by Moment, by Carla MacLachlan.

Carla MacLachlan is one of a few ladies the Lord has used greatly to mentor me over the years.  I love her dearly, but I must tell you that what makes her most winsome and precious to me is not so much her personality, her image, her status, or her ability to make me feel better about myself.  The Lord has equipped Carla with a fierce love for Him and His Word.  She is gifted at being able to ask loving questions that pierce right to the spiritual heart of a matter.  She encourages like no one else I know because her basis for encouragement is Scripture and its principles.  I can depend on her advice, not because it's "hers" or it's clever or convenient, but because her words point to God's.

What I love about this book:

• its format:  Devotional reading.  I've read some really helpful Biblical Parenting books, but I struggle to complete them.  The stream of "Mama!" calls and tyranny of urgent tasks at home limits my reading time during this stage of life.  Parenting Moment by Moment has a brief daily entry which is clear, concise, and biblical.  Additional Scripture is included for me to meditate on at the end of each entry.
• its divisions:  Spiritual Stages.  While physical ages are typical sections in parenting books and they could certainly apply here as well, readers are encouraged to approach the sections with Spiritual Development in mind.  Parents of Elementary Students need not skip ahead and worry they'll be playing catch-up or that it's too late.
• its focus:  the standard of absolute truth.  No matter what different stages of parenting or types of personalities exist amongst my kiddos, I can stand securely and confidently on God's Word. No more "because I said so"-- now my reasons for expectations and my methods for training are based on God's infinite wisdom and loving discipline.
• its effect:  I too am trained.  I'm equipped to better communicate truth to my kids.  I grow in my own knowledge and understanding of Scripture.  I become a parent who honors God and trains my children to recognize and follow God's plan.

I am pleased to give away a copy of this book!  Here's how to enter:
1.  You get 1 (one) entry for posting a favorite Bible verse.
2.  You get another entry (one) if you follow @mbmministries on Twitter and/or "like" Moment By Moment Ministries on Facebook and comment here a second time saying which you followed/liked.

One comment series per family please!   You have until 11:59 pm Central time NEXT Wednesday, December 1st, to enter.  The randomly selected winner shall be proclaimed the following day.

Bonus!  Go to Carla's website, where you can download a free excerpt from the book!

Not wasted.

I certainly plan on posting more of our goings-on soon. For now, though, I want to post this video.

The Story of Zac Smith from NewSpring Media on Vimeo.

You can find Zac Smith's blog here. He has some of his "favorite" posts (or ones that best describe him) here and has three insightful posts on handling suffering here: 1, 2, 3. You might take a little time to read through the rest of his journey as well.

Zac's blog has a new post today. Zac gets to see what has until now been unseen, to see Jesus face to face, who forgave his sin and replaced it with His righteousness so that he could live with Hope and can now be eternally in His presence.

My heart hurts for what the effects of a fallen world have on us and those around us. I'm just in my thirties, and I'm so aware lately of the brevity of life. I'm thankful for Zac's witness and that he gave God all the glory throughout. (Please pray for his wife and three kids.) I'm thankful and grateful that I know the One who can fix and restore everything to what it was intended to be! You can know Him too... please don't wait...

When He Whispers

Things have been really tight.  My political/economical soapbox will not make an appearance here, but let's just say that we're feeling the squeeze much like many others are.

We've experienced this in the past once or a couple of times, with unwise spending or with medical bills, but when you know you've practiced self control and it still happens, there's a helpless feeling that can be difficult to shake.

I had to make a conscious decision the other day not to wallow or despair.  That's when a little verse popped into my mind... I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content... (something something something) in abundance and in need, I can do all things through Christ...

Wild how the Holy Spirit can whisper a verse back into your mind that you memorized a long time ago, even though it is against your very nature to be in automatic Spiritual Response mode.

So, I dragged myself to the Word and decided that I needed to get some context on that verse.  Over time, I've learned a couple of things about God's Word:

• All Scripture is straight from God, and it's useful in every aspect of life.  
• Every part of Scripture is a message originally written to a specific audience for a specific purpose.  The undergirding principles in that message are of ultimate importance for me today, regardless of whether the original audience is "outdated" or the situation is foreign to me.
• If I don't read before and after a verse, I might misunderstand it.
• If I don't get that surrounding context, I might be tempted to twist it to apply to my situation, when it really doesn't.

Here's what I read:

written by Paul to the group of believers in Philippi (modern day Greece near Turkey)  
Philippians chapter 4, verse 4 and following

4 Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. 5 Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; 6 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Ouch.  I wasn't rejoicing always.  I was being unreasonable and anxious.  However, WOW.  The Lord is at hand.  I can take my concerns to Him instead of being anxious.  Because Christ has redeemed me, He gives me unfathomable peace in exchange, which will guide my heart and mind.

8 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. 9 What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.

Ok.  That's what I need to be thinking about instead of having a pity party. This will be so much more easy with that unfathomable peace that guards my mind.  God is with me.

God's Provision

10 I rejoiced in the Lord greatly that now at length you have revived your concern for me. You were indeed concerned for me, but you had no opportunity. 11 Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. 12 I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. 13 I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

Financial abundance does not necessarily indicate God's approval or blessing, nor does lack of money mean that God disapproves.  Paul had seasons of both as he faithfully lived out God's call on his life. 

14 Yet it was kind of you to share my trouble. 15 And you Philippians yourselves know that in the beginning of the gospel, when I left Macedonia, no church entered into partnership with me in giving and receiving, except you only. 16 Even in Thessalonica you sent me help for my needs once and again. 17 Not that I seek the gift, but I seek the fruit that increases to your credit. 18 I have received full payment, and more. I am well supplied, having received from Epaphroditus the gifts you sent, a fragrant offering, a sacrifice acceptable and pleasing to God. 19 And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. 20 To our God and Father be glory forever and ever. Amen.

Verses from the ESV Study Bible

That's it.  Because I'm in Christ, my needs will be taken care of.  For His glory.

I wanted to believe that.  I do believe that, in an abstract way.  I choose to trust.


Then He whispered again.

Something I had done a few days prior that popped back up again without warning.  I discovered our neighbors' 3 schnauzers out one afternoon because their garage door was left open by accident when they left for work.  We don't know our neighbors well, but I wrangled the dogs back into the garage, and managed to shut the door without them getting out.  I told them that evening about putting their dogs back, but that I wasn't sure if their belongings in the garage had been affected or taken during the time period before I came home.  (They have a really nice car that was in the garage also and was still there). The neighbor thanked me profusely for helping rescue the dogs.  I went home.

Within half an hour of reading Philippians (above) and deciding I would choose to be a doer of what I read instead of reading and forgetting, there was a knock on the door.  I don't like answering the door when Scott's not home, but when they wouldn't go away, I answered.  It was my neighbor and her husband.  This is why they came over:

A week's worth of groceries and a toy dog for my kids in thanks for something I thought was inconsequential and just something neighbors do for each other.  It was my turn for profuse thanksgiving, both to the neighbors...

and to my Lord, who whispered a tiny little concrete reminder that The God of Peace is near to those who follow Him.

I'm thankful for this time of frugality.  This required simplicity will teach me to not be attached to material things.  It has already opened a door to get to know our neighbors better.  I choose to rejoice and eagerly learn whatever else the Lord will teach us during this season of our lives.

Are you reading?

I must confess I'm a few days behind on my readings for my Through-the-Bible reading plan. I think it'll be easy to catch back up, though. I love that the plan I use also offers the chance to receive the day's reading via email. It serves as a good reminder, and since I sometimes check email on the go with my cell phone, I can read my passage even if I don't have my Bible with me.

How are you doing? Don't let yourself feel guilty if you haven't started at all or if you have fallen behind! Just commit to read it through from now to a year from now!

2 Timothy 3:16-17 tells us that

"All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be competent, equipped for every good work."

I'm confident that whether you read the Bible through daily in 2010 or into 2011, God will bless your commitment! What a great opportunity to see how God has woven His plan for redemption throughout His Word!

Let's get busy reading!

Join me! It's not too late!

Scott and I are going to read a little each day and make it through the entire Bible during 2010. Will you join us?

I've found a nifty way to post it on my blog for you to click and read, but if you want to do it without visiting my blog each day, there are 6 nifty ways to follow the same reading plan we are:

The ESV Study Bible plan (you don't have to have the English Standard Version translation, nor the Study Bible variety, though) from Crossway Publishers

Web: Click here to find the web page that is updated daily to reflect the reading passages for the day.

RSS: This is the RSS feed that can be delivered directly to your Feed Reader (like Feed Burner, Google Reader, and some cell phone browsers) Incidentally, it's also how I power the widget on my blog (above).

Email: Click here to enter your email and receive the daily passages directly in your Inbox. You must respond to a simple confirmation email, then you might have to make sure that your Spam Filter doesn't relegate the first email to your spam box.

iCal: Have a Mac or other Apple product that uses iCal? Get your iCal file here.

Mobile: This is the link to the mobile-friendly website that posts each day's passages. Read from your cell phone on the go!

Print: Like having a hard copy of the plan but don't have the ESV Study Bible? Print out the PDF file by clicking here!


You're not starting too late!
All you have to do is start at Jan. 1st's passage. Read that day's passages plus one extra day's worth till you get caught up! No problem!

Please let me know in the comments below if you're joining us in our quest! That way I can pray for you and encourage you!

What does He uphold by the word of his power?

Hebrews 1:3
He [Jesus] is the radiance of the glory of God and the exact imprint of his nature, and he upholds the universe by the word of his power. After making purification for sins, he sat down at the right hand of the Majesty on high...



HT: Z via JT

I'm taking the challenge... Join me?

I stumbled across this link thanks to Tim Challies' blog and decided that it would be a great time to take the 30 day Husband Encouragement Challenge.

***Click the link just above to sign up for a daily email challenge that lasts 30 days. OR, click the button below to download a printable document instead.***


I've started today! Will you join me in the challenge and encourage the man God brought into your life to be your husband?

Also available at the challenge website is are challenges for a True Woman Makeover, A TV-Free 30 days, Praying for your Pastor, and Praying for your Pastor's Wife. I haven't done them yet, but I will!

Rocks Cry Out.... D to the C part Quatre

** continued posts on our trip to DC this past June**

In a city known for its significant part in forming and directing a nation, the very architecture of the buildings proclaims the relative importance of the role of those buildings and their contents. Special thought was given to the style of architecture, the setup of the buildings, and what their structure would proclaim.

Nate had asked Scott if there was anything in particular he'd like to see in DC. I was taken a little by surprise when he answered that he'd really like to see a lot of the churches and cathedrals and religious influences on the town. I wasn't entirely surprised, mind you, but of all the things to do in our nation's Capital, I didn't think that would be tops on the list. Boy, though, I was glad that it was!

Let me preface these next thoughts with a realization: In asking myself "What makes a church?", I am quick to recognize that the church is less a building or place than it is simply the gathering of a group of people who have devoted their lives to Christ. A church building can take on many appearances and still "house" the Body of Christ (the people who are believers).

I've seen many healthy gatherings of Christ-followers meet to worship the Lord in High School gymnasiums, movie theaters, in public parks, in individuals' homes, in refurbished warehouses, in shopping centers, and in buildings that are more easily and traditionally identified as 'churches'.

I've also witnessed religious gatherings (in very capital R Religious buildings) which actually do very little to exalt God or proclaim the Gospel that Christ came to be a substitutionary sacrifice and pay the penalty of sin so that believers could be made right with God and have relationship with Him. The building doesn't make the gathering a Church, necessarily. It's the gathering that makes the Church.

That being said, however, I really came to appreciate the intent of the architecture of the many church buildings we passed by as we wandered around DC. Mostly, these buildings contributed to the understanding that meeting to worship God is an important, intentional, reverent, wonderful thing, and that God is majestic, great, glorious, and powerful, yet He desires fellowship with us. Can I share some pictures?

gorgeous.


purposeful.


Our last intentional stop was at the National Cathedral. The building itself, its gothic architecture, boldly proclaims that the God whom the building was originally intended to represent is one of Glory, Majesty, and Awe.
(even though, sadly, today the building houses more of a mish-mash of religious hodgepodge that may or may not have anything to do with the God of the Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob and the Lion of Judah, Jesus Christ.)

We visited the Cathedral at dusk. While we didn't get to go inside because of the time of day, we enjoyed walking around and observing the amazing structures, the lush garden nearby, and sitting under some very large tree canopies while talking about and reflecting upon spiritual matters and Theology.














The arches and towers point Upward.

The windows are artistic and majestic.

The very stones-- the rocks-- in their careful placement and purposeful design, cry out that there is a Majestic God who created beauty, detail, order, and that He alone is worthy of our worship, praise, and devotion.

It reminds me that we too are created for worship. Believers, who by Grace have been saved through Faith, have specific purpose and design for our lives, from our Creator, to reflect His glory.

Celebrate!

On the forefront of my mind right now is sharing in the joy of friends for a common reason: Adoption!

Recently, our pastor's family adopted and brought home a precious son from Ghana. We have several dear friends who were, themselves, blessed by being adopted or adopting children into their families.

Also, our very dear friends we served with back in Missouri are at this very moment PACKING -- for they have received word that after months and months and months of waiting, they are cleared to book flights and prepare to traverse the globe to bring home baby Micah!

Below is the video Alisa made showing all they've had to hold on to for the time being: pictures of precious baby Micah and their faith in Sovereign God and His plans for them and for Micah.

Make video montages at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Most of you know me as someone who doesn't get overly emotional, but I will tell you that I cry tears of joy EVERY time I watch this. Check their blog for ways you can pray for their journey!

It's a wonderful thing, and it is also a wonderful example of just what God desires for us! Russell Moore has great points about Names and Adoption. Al Mohler also puts it eloquently:

In the New Testament, adoption serves as a primary analogy of salvation. The sinner, who prior to faith in Christ is a rebel headed for destruction, is now adopted as a child of God. This new status is further defined as that of a joint-heir with Christ. By grace, the rebel child of the enemy is adopted as a child of the King. The former slave to sin is now a son or daughter of the heavenly Father.

As the Apostle Paul explains:

In the same way we also, when we were children, were enslaved to the elementary principles of the world. But when the fullness of time had come, God sent forth his Son, born of woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons. And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, “Abba! Father!” So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, then an heir through God. [Galatians 4:3-7, esv]

Mohler closed his post with this comment: "For Christians, this is thus a matter of adoption by the adopted. Such is the Kingdom of God."

Celebrate with me -- for friends, for families everywhere, and for what God has made possible for us by sending His Son for the purpose of paying the price for our sin (which separates us from God), allowing us to be reconciled to God when we believe, and bringing us all into one family -- His own!

His grace has planned it all,
'Tis mine but to believe,

And recognize His work of love and Christ receive.
read this week at desiringgod.org

Life is Precious

This week is the Sanctity of Human Life week.

I find it convenient timing, as one of the first promises our new president made prior to his inauguration was to sign the Freedom of Choice Act, which would:

eradicate state and federal laws that the majority of Americans support, such as:

• Bans on Partial Birth Abortion
• Requirements that women be given information about the risks of getting an abortion
• Only licensed physicians can perform abortions
• Parents must be informed and give consent to their minor daughter's abortion

FOCA would erase these laws and prevent states from enacting similar protective measures in the future.

----------------------------------------

Watch this spot that's being aired on Black Entertainment Television:


No matter how inconvenient, every baby in the womb has value.

----------------------------------------

Here are some really good related links. Chew on these for a while:

The case for life, around the web by Justin Taylor

Why are we striving to make abortion unthinkable? John Ensor, guest post on Challies.com

Who is Jane Roe from the Roe v. Wade case? "Roe no more" by Justin Taylor

Being Pro-life Christians under a Pro-choice President by John Piper

Number of Abortions since 1973 by Justin Taylor

Here are two reasons I'm prolife:

Parenting is never easy, but I'd never trade the joy and blessings these two have brought me!

HT: JT, DG, TC

Countdown!

***UPDATE*** Found it on my doorstep tonight when I got home... WOOHOO! Whoop!



I've been waiting for some time for this one... When Scott asked me what I wanted for our anniversary, the answer was EASY. Crossway Publishing is releasing the study Bible version of its new translation of the Bible on October 15th! He pre-ordered a copy, and I can't wait for it to get here!

Why am I so excited?

I love to know the context of Scripture. It shows me exactly what God intended when He inspired what I am reading. I love diving into the context of Scripture by checking out maps, using study materials, understanding the culture and traditions of the time periods, etc. Doing so helps me properly apply Scripture to my own life and truly reminds me how God's Word is living and active.

This Study Bible (in addition to being one of the most closely accurate-to-the-original-language translations) is chock-full of the following:

• Over 200 full-color maps—created with the latest digital technology, satellite images, and archaeological research; printed in full color throughout the Bible.


• 200-plus charts—offering key insights and in-depth analysis in clear, concise outline form; located throughout the Bible.
• 80,000 cross-references—to encourage easy location of important words, passages, and biblical themes.
• 40 all-new illustrations—including full-color renderings and architectural diagrams of the Tabernacle, the Ark of the Covenant, Solomon’s temple, Herod’s temple, the city of Jerusalem in Jesus’ time and throughout the history of Israel, and many more.

Here is a sample image from Crossway's ESV SB website: (click to enlarge)


I respect the attitude of the Godly men and women who have worked hard to put this together. Here is the stated purpose from the Crossway site (Linked to above):

The goal and vision of the ESV Study Bible is, first and foremost, to honor the Lord—in terms of the excellence, beauty, and accuracy of its content and design; and in terms of helping people come to a deeper understanding of the Bible, of the Gospel, and of Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior. Crossway is a not-for-profit publishing ministry and all receipts from the ESV Study Bible go directly toward the support of this ministry goal around the world.

Oh yes he did! *snap snap*

Evidently there was a multitude of comments on the original location from my last post about what to do about sharing a bad report about someone with others. One of the authors posted this response:

I'm struck that many commenters focus on identifying the exceptions, rather than camping out on the major emphasis of our short article—everything that comes from our mouths (and computers) should be truly constructive to any who hear or read. We should actively intend good, seeking to “give grace to those who hear.” That takes thought about one's motives, tone, framing, balance of emphases.

There are times to name what's wrong and to name names. Both Tim and I do that in our writing and teaching, and the article mentions in passing the call to such candor. I appreciate efforts of commenters to identify exceptions and nuances, when and how to make someone else’s apparent wrongs more widely known. Thoughtful work on that topic will break new ground, applying the call to “speak truth in love” into an instant-information context where all errors, blunders, sins, failings, and mere clumsiness are potentially available for public scorn. What does it mean to forebear each other in such a world? What does it mean to cover sins in mercy (not cover-up, but true covering in mercy), to allow others to find care and restoration in their own interpersonal context, rather than attempting to humiliate them before the whole world? What does it mean to express the sort of communal tenderness that Dietrich Bonhoeffer captures so well in Life Together—a communal life that includes reproof as a form of love?

But the leading edge of our argument is to place checks on the tendency we all have to snide, sneering, self-righteous, gossipy, malicious words. Any growth we can make in the direction of Ephesians 4:29 will make life much more joyous for all, and bring much glory to our God. And even criticisms I make become more hearable when I the critic am not posturing, but actually care about others. When I don’t care, my bad attitude and superiority becomes my actual message. Love is patient, love is kind . . . and then love is candid. I hope readers might even go back and give our article a second reading.

Blessings,

David Powlison

Oh no he didn't! *snap*

Exactly a week ago, I came across (through a string of random links) a blog argument. It was between 4 Christian gentlemen (pastors/professors) who would likely be well known in Christian circles here in the U.S. The argument began over a planned friendly debate concerning two viewpoints on an area of belief about God. The discussion disintegrated into hurtful and harsh comments on personal email that made its way to public blogs. I won't link to the blog that I read, so as not to pass it on, but I will tell you I was greatly dismayed and ashamed as I witnessed believers attacking other believers. I recognize that any sinner has the propensity to act this way, but it was a horrible witness on both sides. Resolution of the issue in a Godly way was nowhere to be seen, and hasty judgments were everywhere. The real reason for disagreement had become lost. I didn't know the people involved personally, but my heart was heavy; I found myself crying out, "There's got to be a Biblical way to resolve such a disagreement without harming the entire Body of Christ (the Church--as a whole) in the process!"

I was reminded of many times in the past that I've experienced wrong-doing, with a former teaching situation, with friends, with ministry, to people I didn't know very well, and toward ones I've loved. Then today, in God's providence, I came across an article that addresses the problem (and may have been aimed specifically at the situation above). It was a "yeah, that's the right way"/"ouch" discovery on my part. I found it particularly helpful and challenging. May I share it with you?

(be patient... the article may look long, but it's a quick read)

I challenge you to read it from 3 perspectives: As one who sees a problem with someone that you feel you need to address, as one who has been confronted, and as an observer whose friend has confronted another/been the confrontee.

Should You Pass on Bad Reports?
by Tim Keller & David Powlison


One obvious genius of the internet is that it’s “viral.” Information explodes to the whole world. The old neighborhood grapevine and the postal service seem like ox-carts in a speed-of-light universe. (Do twenty-somethings even know what those antiquities once were? In the old days, people had to talk to each other or stick a stamp on an envelope.) Instantaneous transmission produces some wonderfully good things. Truth, like joy, is infectious. A great idea feeds into a million inboxes. But it also produces some disastrous evils. Lies, rumors, and disinformation travel just as far and just as fast.

So what should you do when you hear “bad reports” about a person or church or ministry? We want to offer a few thoughts on how to remain constructive. To paraphrase Ephesians 4:29, “Let no unwholesome words come out of your computer, but only what is constructive, in order to meet the need of the moment, that what you communicate will give grace to everyone who ever reads it.” That Greek word translated “unwholesome” is sapros. It means something that is inedible, either devoid of nutritional value or rotten and even poisonous. It applies to thorny briars or to fish or fruit that’s gone bad. At best, it’s of no benefit to anyone. At worst, it’s sickening and destructive. Consider three things in how to stay constructive.

What Does James Say about Passing Along Bad Reports?

Humble yourselves before the Lord.
Brothers, don’t slander or attack one
another.
(James 4:10-11)

The verb “slander” simply means to “speak against” (Gk. kata-lalein). It is not necessarily a false report, just an “against-report.” The intent is to belittle another. To pour out contempt. To mock. To hurt. To harm. To destroy. To rejoice in purported evil. This can’t mean simple disagreement with ideas—that would mean that we could never have a debate over a point. This isn’t respectful disagreement with ideas. James warns against attacking a person’s motives and character, so that the listeners’ respect and love for the person is undermined. “As the north wind brings rain, so slander brings angry looks” (Prov. 25:23). Everybody gets upset at somebody else: slanderer, slanderee, slander-hearer.

The link of slander to pride in James 4:10 shows that slander is not the humble evaluation of error or fault, which we must constantly be doing. Rather, in slander the speaker speaks as if he never would do the same thing himself. It acts self-righteous and superior toward one’s obviously idiotic inferiors. Non-slanderous evaluation is fair-minded, constructive, gentle, guarded, and always demonstrates that speakers sense how much they share the same frailty, humanity, and sinful nature with the one being criticized. It shows a profound awareness of your own sin. It is never “against-speaking.”

James 5:9 adds a nuance: "Don’t grumble against one another." Literally, it means don’t moan and groan and roll your eyes. This refers to a kind of against-speaking that is not as specific as a focused slander or attack. It hints at others flaws, not only with words, but by body language and tone. In print, such attitudes are communicated by innuendo, guilt by association, sneering, pejorative vocabulary. In person, it means shaking your head, rolling your eyes, and re-enforcing the erosion of love and respect for someone else. For example, “You know how they do things around here. Yadda, yadda. What do you expect?” Such a “groan” accomplishes the same thing as outright slander. It brings “angry looks” to all concerned. Passing on negative stuff always undermines love and respect. It’s never nourishing, never constructive, never timely, never grace-giving.

What Does the Book of Proverbs Say about Receiving Bad Reports?

He who covers over an offense promotes love,
but whoever repeats the matter
separates close friends.
(Proverbs 17:9)

The first thing to do when hearing or seeing something negative is to seek to “cover” the offense rather than speak about it to others. That is, rather than let a bad report “pass in” to your heart as truth, and then get “passed along” to others, you should seek to keep the matter from destroying your love and regard for a person. How?

Start by remembering your own sinfulness. "All a man’s ways seem innocent to him, but motives are weighed by the Lord" (Prov. 16:2). To know this automatically keeps you from being too sure of your position and of speaking too strongly against people that you hear about or people on the other side of a conflict. You intuitively realize that you may not be seeing things right. Your motives are never as pure as you think they are. To know this acts to keep you from being too sure of the facts, too sure of your position, and of speaking too quickly and too negatively about other people. Knowing your own sinfulness helps you not make snap judgments that take what you hear too seriously.

When you remember your sinfulness, remember God’s mercies. "Love covers all offenses" (Prov. 10:12). The God who is love has covered all your offenses. He knows everything about you (and the whole story about that other person). He has chosen to forgive you, and life-saving mercy cost Jesus his life. He could write you up with a 100% True Bad Report, but he has chosen to bury your sins in the depths of the ocean. That makes the life and death difference. If your sins are not buried in the ocean of his mercy, then you will be justly exposed and will justly perish. But when you’ve known mercy, then even when you hear report of grievous evil, an instinct toward mercy should arise within you. To savor the tasty morsels of gossip and bad reports is very different from grieving, caring, and wishing nothing less than the mercies of Christ upon all involved. And most bad reports are much more trivial. They are the stuff of busybodies and gossips going “tut-tut-tut.”

Then remember that there is always another side. "The first to present his case seems right, till another comes forward and questions him" (Prov. 18:17). You never have all the facts. And you never have all the facts you need all at once. You are never in a position to see the whole picture, and therefore when you hear the first report, you should assume you have far too little information to draw an immediate conclusion. What you’ve heard from someone else is only “hear-say” evidence. It has no standing or validity unless it is confirmed in other ways.

So when you hear a negative report about another, you must keep it from passing into your heart as though it were true. If you pass judgment based on hear-say, you are a fool. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t check out the facts. Go to the person. Hear other witnesses. If you’re far away from the scene, wait for more of the story to come out. Suspend judgment. Don’t get panicked or stampeded by mob-psychology and rumors. Be content not to know many things. You don’t need to have an opinion about everything and everyone.

Third, what should you do if you are close enough to the situation to be involved AND you think the injustice or matter is too great or grievous for you to ignore? For starters, notice that you only really need to know something if it touches your sphere of life and relationships. In that case, you should do what will help you to express God’s call upon you to speak Ephesians 4:29 words of wise love.

In Derek Kidner’s commentary on Prov. 25:7–10, he writes that when you think someone has done wrong you should remember, “One seldom knows the full facts (v.8) and one’s motives in spreading a story are seldom as pure as one pretends (v.10). To run to the law or to the neighbors is usually to run away from the duty of personal relationship.” See Christ’s clinching comment in Matthew 18:15: "If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother." In short, if you feel the problem is too great and you can’t keep it from destroying your regard for the person, you must go personally before you go to anyone else.

When Should You Go?

Galatians 6:1 says we are to go when a person is caught in a trespass. That means there should be some kind of "pattern" or the unmistakable exposure of a wrong. Don’t go the first time you hear a bad report about someone doing wrong. As we said above, there’s another side to most stories, and our motives are never totally pure when we get indignant. Go if the person seems caught—that is, trapped or stuck in a habit pattern of wrong behavior or falsehood.

How Should You Go?

Galatians 6:1 says we are to restore gently and in humility, bearing all the fruit of the Spirit. Beware of your own tendencies to be tempted—perhaps to the same sin, perhaps to reactive sins of self-righteousness or judgmentalism, perhaps to avoidance sins of cover-up and pretending. Galatians 6:2 goes on to say that we actually fulfill the law of Christ by bearing each other’s burdens. We become nothing less than lesser redeemers in the pattern of our Great Redeemer. Jesus in Matthew 18:15ff says we should also go persistently, and not give up in the process. Patience is one fruit of the Spirit because problems don’t always clear up quickly. There is a progression in efforts to get to the bottom of a bad report, to confirm the facts, and to work at bringing restoration.

Who Should Go?

Galatians 6 says you—plural—who are spiritual should go to the straying one. That both defines how you should go and it calls for multiple people to get involved. Similarly Matthew 18:15ff says to bring in other people if matters don’t resolve one to one. The right kind of checking out a bad report is always done in person and often will be done by involving multiple wise persons.

Why Should You Go?

In both Galatians 6 and Matthew 18 the goal is to restore the person and to re-establish sin-broken relationships. You are working to restore people both to God and to others.

Conclusion

In summary, from the Old Testament to the New Testament, the principle is this. If you hear bad reports about other Christians you must either cover it with love or go to them personally before speaking of it to any others.

• The first thing to do is to simply suspend judgment. Don’t pass on bad reports.
• The second thing to do is “cover” it in love, reminding yourself that you don’t know all about the heart of the person who may have done evil—and you know your own frailty. Don’t allow bad reports to pass into your own heart.
• The final thing to do is go and speak to them personally.

What you should never do is rush to judgment, or withdraw from loving another, or pass on the negative report to others. This is challenge enough when you’re dealing with the local grapevine or slow-moving postal service. In a world of instant world-wide communication of information it’s an even bigger challenge, because you can do bigger damage more quickly.

Whether the bad report offers true information, or partial information, or disinformation, or false information—it is even more important that you exercise great discretion, and that you take pains to maximize boots-on-the-ground interpersonal relationships.

I hope this Biblical perspective is helpful to you like it was to me! I love that there is an Answer as to how to address gossip and reconcile true issues of wrong-doing (without simply ignoring the wrong-doing). It involves humility on both sides. I admit I've failed in how I've responded to multiple issues. It helps me to be reminded of what John Newton said (a former slave trader who wrote the hymn Amazing Grace after having his life changed by Christ):

“My memory is nearly gone, but I remember two things: That I am a great sinner and that Christ is a great Savior.”

—John Newton, quoted in Jonathan Aitken, John Newton: From Disgrace to Amazing Grace (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Books, 2007), 347

The Moment has Arrived!

...talk about a loaded title...

I'm referring to the posting online of Scott's sermon during our church's Generations series based on Titus 2, which speaks to different generations within the church body.

The site is relatively new, and they've changed video players, so I've yet to figure out how to embed the file straight to the blog. When that happens, I'll post it anew!

Until then, you can watch the sermon in full here, but be sure to click on Generations #4 -- College Students (but boy, does the message apply to all of us!).

We've had a loaded summer as well, so be looking for upcoming posts documenting our month of June!

Heard at the McDonaldspot

Lest you think our kids are perfect, let me fill you in on what we heard at the grandparent's spot tonight:

(setting: dinner with a family friend is over, and we're sitting at the table talking. The kids are playing in the toy room, but they're getting restless. Caleb wants to build a marble run, but it's not safe to do so around Anna. We've told him "no" twice.)

Caleb from the living room: You know what would make me happy? Getting to play with the marble tower right now. I really want someone to make me happy right now.


We tried really hard not to laugh. Of course, the situation was dealt with, but have you ever been there? I don't mean with kids... have you ever been there?

Both the tune from this Chase Credit commercial and the theme of this settlement commercial sum it up pretty well, but haven't we all had a (several) bout(s) with that yucky part of our sin natures called selfishness?

...Not to mention the instant gratification that we crave from technology, fast food, and just about everything else in life.

I searched for some applicable verses when I decided to post this funny comment by our sweet boy. Here's what I found that encouraged and challenged me:

2 Corinthians 5:14
For Christ's love compels us, because we are convinced that one died for all, and therefore all died.
And He died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for Him who died for them and was raised again.

Philippians 2:3,4
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.
Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.
both NIV translation

It's definitely a daily battle, but with the Holy Spirit's help and strength, I'm up to the challenge. Are you?

Constant Awe, Weighty Responsibility

I can't fully express the awe, excitement, joy, and gratitude I feel when I get yet another glimpse of how from the beginning of time, God has had a purpose in everything and how everything in Scripture points to Jesus and our need for Him. Whether that be the need for a Savior to restore what was lost when Adam and Eve sinned, the prophecy statements in Isaiah that Jesus fulfilled to the "t", or the symbolic example set by Jonah -- three days in the depths, then coming back to live anew, every story whispers His name.

I love the big picture of God's plan. I've recently studied about the Promised Land (linked to in previous post), and I read through Deuteronomy to get some context. There were the Hebrew people, poised (for the second time) to enter the land God had promised them . They had been there once before, but because they didn't have the faith to enter the wonderful land due to its formidable people, they were punished with years of wandering.

Now, at the Jordan River opposite Jericho, Moses stopped the people for some important words. The book of Deuteronomy (Greek deuteronomium = second law) is named for what Moses did there: he recounted the law God had given their parents' generation and reminded them of everything the Lord had done for their people. The new generation that would be entering the land (minus their faith-less parents who died during the wandering) must know Who gave them the land, His love for them as His chosen people, the necessity of obedience to His laws, and the consequences that would definitely come if they disobeyed. It was really a first-things-first situation. They had to be reminded in order to fully appreciate what was about to happen: God's faithfulness, provision, and protection.

The Hebrews went on to conquer the very peoples that their parents' generation had feared. Many of the battles were won without much effort on their part, because God led the way and showed His glory. Obedience led to victory and blessing. Disobedience led to failure and deaths at the worst, and assimilation in to a culture that worshiped other gods at the least (maybe that was the worst). The book of Joshua recounts this process of the Israelites possessing the land.

The people had been faithful to the Lord for the time of Joshua's leadership and the elders' leadership during that time. Then we reach the book of Judges.

In the first chapter we see that the tribe of Benjamin refuses to drive out the people in their territory. Assimilation begins. In chapter 2, we learn that enough time has passed for that faithful generation to pass away. Here's the disheartening part:

2:10

And all that generation also were gathered to their fathers. And there arose another generation after them who did not know the Lord or the work that he had done for Israel.

2:11

And the people of Israel did what was evil in the sight of the Lord and served the Baals.

2:12

And they abandoned the Lord, the God of their fathers, who had brought them out of the land of Egypt. They went after other gods, from among the gods of the peoples who were around them, and bowed down to them. And they provoked the Lord to anger.

The remainder of the account in Judges shows the downward spiral of God's people, as God brought a Judge to bring them out of disobedience to faithfulness, they obeyed for a while and prospered, and then they began to worship other gods again.

What caused this?

There arose another generation after them who did not know the Lord or the work He had done for Israel.

Thus the weighty responsibility:
to teach our children faithfully. To recount to them how God has moved throughout history and also personally in our lives. That's a hard thing to do! It doesn't come naturally to me to speak of spiritual things face-to-face with people. Is it the fear of being hyper-spiritual? Is it lack of gratitude or recognition of God working in everything? I hope not! But how convicting that blogging is another situation entirely for some reason. I pray that the Lord will guide me in making daily talk about Him a more consistent part of our family's life together. I pray that He'll give me boldness to make every moment a teachable one, that perhaps the Holy Spirit will use me to awaken their hearts to the One who can free them from the entrapment and despair of our sinfulness.

but there's a tangent to that...
to share Truth with others. After all, we can see evidences now that faith is much less important these days. Scratch that... religion and "spirituality" are important, but very relative and often composed of a mish-mash of different belief systems. I'm praying that I'll be bold enough to speak openly of the difference Christ makes. Not to make converts; rather, so that no one has to live life without a relationship with the One who made them, that life can be more than just "hopeful". Instead it can be one of true hope: a guaranteed hope you can "take to the bank." The promise is that we can be freed of our inability to measure up to God's standard if we'll accept that Christ sacrificed himself to pay our penalty for sin -- that giving our lives over to Him is actually freeing and allows us to live abundantly and bring Him glory. I worry sometimes that when I am bold enough, I don't communicate effectively. Yet the urgency of making sure that current generations know the Lord makes me want to combat that worry and trust that the Lord can use even my flawed communication for His glory.

I'm tempted to apologize for a lengthy post, but I'll stop myself and be reminded that to be more comfortable speaking of Christ is exactly what I'm needing.

Want some parenting resources to help you accomplish teaching your children as well? How about Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp, Teach them Diligently by Lou Priolo, and the Jesus Storybook Bible by Sally Lloyd-Jones. I love these, and though I'm not proficient at what I've learned from them, I'm working on it! Another, which I haven't read but looks promising, is Parenting with Scripture by Kara Durbin.

How about music? We LOVE Hide 'Em In Your Heart vol. 1-3 by Steve Green and Seeds Family Worship (4 CDs) All-Scripture-lyrics make it easy for the kids (AND ME!) to memorize and internalize God's Word so we can apply it to our lives.

Good Friday Context!

I'm all about sharing good things that help me put some context on things I learn in the Bible, making the Scriptures more than just stories. That's why I love the "That the World May Know" bible study series.

It's also why I'm sharing this Easter-specific tool with you!!! Make the crucifixion and resurrection even more real to yourself by using a present-day Google Satellite Map of Jerusalem to trace the events! (Thanks to Between Two Worlds for this great post!)



View Larger Map

Bring the Rain?

Scott had another excellent post on his blog . After that post, we discovered a song that had already been playing for a while on Christian radio. It's by MercyMe, and is appropriately titled "Jesus Bring the Rain." Can I share some of the lyrics with you?

I can count a million times ~ People asking me how I

Can praise You with all that I've gone through

The question just amazes me ~ Can circumstances possibly

Change who I forever am in You

Maybe since my life was changed ~ Long before these rainy days

It's never really ever crossed my mind

To turn my back on You oh Lord ~ My only shelter from the storm

But instead I draw closer through these times

So I pray

Bring me joy, bring me peace ~ Bring the chance to be free

Bring me anything that brings You glory

And I know there'll be days ~ When this life brings me pain

But if that's what it takes to praise You...

Jesus bring the rain.

I am yours regardless of ~ The dark clouds that may loom above

Because You are much greater than my pain

You who made a way for me ~ By suffering Your destiny

So tell me what's a little rain?

So I pray...

and the song continues, then ends with a prayerful, worshipful tag "Holy Holy Holy is the Lord God Almighty". (song copyrighted by MercyMe, http://www.mercyme.org/)
I can't tell you what a blessing the heart attitude and lyrics of the song have been to me. With all that we've experienced in the last year and a half (or two), and with the changes that have come as recently as June, I cling to the truth that Scripture teaches us about our Lord.
While I have not arrived or attained, and while I'm sure that my conduct during difficult times has not been spotless, I am learning through both hindsight and the continuing rain what it means to be crucified with Christ.

I'm presently doing a study on Galatians compiled by a famous Christian speaker. In it, she shares ten characteristics of the life illustrated by Galatians 2:20. "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me."
Of those ten, I'll share a few with you to encourage and challenge you, should you seek to grow deeper in your relationship with the Lord:

• Like the disciples were clueless in John 16 about the events facing Christ, few will understand if you seriously decide to live a life crucified to self and alive in Christ.
• You must be willing to drop your own personal will and plans and seek Him with all your heart in order to live out the plans God has for you according to Jer. 29:11-13.
• There will be times when your dignity is shattered, and you may not be able to prove to others that your decision to stand firm in the Lord truly was the right way to go.

But if we are to truly choose victory in our battle (daily) with sin, we have to choose to die to ourselves-- just as Christ did in fulfilling God's plan for salvation.
All that to say that we can't expect our days to be rainless if we're following Christ. It's more a matter of being sensitive to where the Lord is leading and to what the Lord wants to teach us through the stormy times. I pray that I will continue to give up myself in order to allow the Lord to work in and through me, so that others can taste and see that the Lord is good!

bring me joy, bring me peace, bring the chance to be free
bring me anything that brings You glory
And I know there'll be days when this life brings me pain
but if that's what it takes to praise You, Jesus bring the rain.